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Monday, June 15, 2020

The Closing of the National Affairs Desk

Hey all Metro here. On Saturday I went to dine in at Ruth Chris Steakhouse and ended up running up a $138 tab, well worth it. I even shaved the beard and went for the iconic "Fall of Bryan Metro" LP look (with a touch of The Fiend).


 The location I chose was chosen because it was close and also it was the same location that my dad went to when he retired. The symbolism doesn't end there. I made the decision to go there for a reason. Everything I do is calculated. And with that I am announcing my retirement from writing original content for the Lavender Blog.

There are a surplus of reasons why I am hanging it up but the main ones are there is nothing to write about anymore along with some possible serious health issues. Of course I could write about Black Lives Matter, zzzzzzzz, or the Covid Virus again, zzzzzzzz, but these topics are everywhere on tv, though by less skilled journalists, so its pointless. Also, there is nothing to write about locally because its all Livestream today. Well, aside from Electric Six who is doing a Livestream from Hamtramck (hmmm wonder where that with be, cough, Smalls), and actually charging for it. The greed with them is actually really sad. Scumbags. I digress...

I want to take this time to thank all the Constant Readers for tuning in over these 12 fun years. Whether you appreciated it for its over the top satire and insults, or hated it but couldn't look away, I really mean it. I still have two pieces in the can, but they were written last month and should see the light. One is a Concert For Covid and the other a Concert for Leos Coney, but both need to be heavily edited. So keep your eyes open for those, but for now I say goodbye, it has been fun, and your band sucks.

From the Iceman Goeth,
Bryan Robby Metro

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Be well.

Anonymous said...

Asia wins!

Bryan Metro said...

I know what you are trying to do. But I cannot comment on any specifics. However I can say that this blog has brought spotlight on many people nobody cares about, and after I dipped my toes in the pools of idiocy they became relevant, though for a short bit of time. That comment was not in regards to anybody in particular, but to refer back to your comment. Ehhhhhhh nope, you're wrong.

Bryan Metro said...

To continue, you missed the point of this post. The point was that I have nothing to write about. Nothing more nothing less. Nothing going on locally, and everything else is on ABC. Sure I could write about people like Mere B Louve'in Multiple Breakfasts, but that would get boring quick. So I'll just be working on puzzles.

Anonymous said...

I'm still trying to figure out who in 2020 wants to see Electric Six do a livestream period. And pay for it??? Huh???

Anonymous said...

Europe is better!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Anonymous said...

What a useless cunt of a comment.

Bryan Metro said...

To Anon 5:53/June 21- I always take down comments upon request per blog policy. There are rare times I take them down because of my own opinion, and you made the Honor Roll. I will respond though with no names. I made a personal decision to cease posting because of boredom, not because of any "Vanquishing", unless you define vanquishing by losing money trying to "vanquish", but that doesn't apply to me either, which is probably why you're so sore. That last line was in no regards to anybody in particular. It almost seems like you want me to keep writing, which I'm flattered by. However I have no interest in others' social media which consists of zero real thought/opinion, only reposted links of other hate speech that will be liked by the same 30 people. Thanks for reading though, and I may be back, but will not cover nobodies begging for money. Vanquished...hahahaha.

Anonymous said...

He has threatened to do this many times. He can’t give this up. It’s all he has.

Anonymous said...

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Bryan Metro said...

I have already stated I make no money off this website. I have never even seen $0.15. It is pretty scary that you took the time to look that up. I was being sincere with my retirement. I honestly have nothing to write about and have health issues. I find it glorious that my send off is getting the most traffic. Its like you want me back, you need me back. You parasites can only repost the same poorly written click-bait links to the same 30 people before you get bored. I made you all relevant and I demand REPARATIONS!

Anonymous said...

Can't handle your beer?

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